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Tuesday, January 04, 2005  

Day 4
I've become increasingly self-conscious during these past 4 days of no-smoking. I worried that I'm annoying those around me with my irritability and periodic shouting about needed a smoke. But I have to just say, "fuck 'em" and be loud and obnoxious and let everybody know that I'm quitting or else this whole thing is going to fall apart...

The really frustrating thing is, at this point, I'm not even sure why I set off on this path in the first place! The whole of nicotine addiction is WAY more insidious than I could have imagined. It is like I've lost a close friend (non-smoker will think that is hyperbole, but fuck them they don't KNOW Jake Camel like I knew him.) The minute to minute cravings are not that bad, (especially way out here in day 4,) but the thought that I won't ever be able to enjoy another cigarette after a movie, or after a great meal, or during a long-drive while stuck in traffic is terribly depressing. I feel woefully unequipped to deal with this unexpected sense of loss.

Any ex-smokers out there have any words of advice?

posted by JMV | 1/04/2005 11:24:00 AM
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